Denny Strecker’s Blog

It has long been known that the powerful emotions a parent has for their child can easily overcome any struggle or complication you can throw at it. During my research, I came across this father and son team who prove this theory ten times over and serve as an example to everyone single one of us. The article originally appeared in Sports Illustrated and the video is one of dozens about them on YouTube.

Their motto is “Yes, I Can” and once you read their story and watch the video I attached you will understand what Committment and Love truly are - and hopefully you will take their message and teach it to your children and loved ones.

Click Here to read their story and watch the video

Post your thoughts here after you watch the video and let me know what YOU are going to do as a parent to create the “Yes I Can” thinking in your family.

The other day I saw a father talking to his daughter after she finished her karate class. It was easy to see that he loved his daughter and wanted her to do well… but his desire to see her do well was the very thing that made her feel like a failure - like she couldn’t do anything right. The girl looked like she wanted to run off and cry.

Children, more than anything else, want to be loved and appreciated - especially by busy parents. The amount of approval a child gets from her parents is often the measuring stick by which the child gauge how much they are loved. That’s why children often check to see if Mom and Dad are watching…

As grown-ups, we know how important it is for our children to pay attention while they’re in class… to not miss any piece of information that could be critical to their success. As loving parents, we want our children to do well.

And that’s where the mistake is often made - kids, looking up to see if mom and dad are watching, are sometimes met with a scowl and a quick gesture to turn around and pay attention to the instructor, when all they were looking for was a smile and a thumbs up.

Of course, parents would be horrified to learn that they were unintentionally hurting their child — out of concern and love! None of our “Karate Parents” want to see their children’s self esteem dashed.

You see, people (and children especially!) learn much more efficiently and stay more focused when they are praised for doing something right, rather than criticized for doing something wrong. Children will have the confidence to move out of their comfort zone when they know that they are encouraged and free from criticism.

Parents who want to support their children in class will have the most success when giving their child a quick thumbs up and encouraging their child - loving them with their smile!

Making corrections is our second most important job - please leave it up to us!

You see, developing life skills in children is our number one priority and when working with kids, it’s important to “put first things first” - striving for long term benefits, like Black Belt Excellence, a strong self image, respect, courage, modesty, perseverance, and integrity.

Making corrections in the physical side of the Martial Arts (stances, techniques, etc.) is our second most important job. Especially in the beginning!

We were very excited to learn that this “first things first” system also brings about a very positive side effect.

Just think how excited we were when we realized that when we put positive character development first, excellent physical Martial Arts skills followed! When our teachers “put first things first,” the physical skills of the Martial Arts eventually develop to exciting levels!

Just take a look at the Brown and Black Belts. You will see what I mean.

P.S. If you have a concern about your child’s progress, mistakes, attention span, or behavior while in class (or out of class, for that matter) I encourage you to contact me today!

Please consider carefully the following strategies:

3 Tips for Developing Self-Discipline in Your Children

1. Always, always, do what you say you are going to do. Remember that your children learn from EVERY encounter with you…even if it’s not what you want them to learn! If you tell a child that a certain behavior will cause them to be punished, you MUST follow through with the punishment. Each time you don’t follow through, you teach your child, “Mom and Dad don’t mean what they say.”

If a child, for example, is being disruptive, and you say, “Michael, please stop that,” and then allow Michael to continue, you have effectively taught Michael to disobey! Additionally, children need the security that comes from knowing Mom and Dad are truly in charge. Any inconsistency in your approach robs them of that security

2. Show your children the effects of self-discipline, and the effects of LACK of self-discipline. Be on the lookout for people who are becoming successful as a result of their self-discipline. Families, athletes, famous people, even fictional characters can be great examples. In the same way, show your children the results of the lack of self-discipline. Discuss people who are in trouble, or people who don’t get the results they want, and show your children how the breakdown in their self-discipline led them to trouble!

3. Paint an exciting future for your children. Inspire them to dream big dreams, to think boldly about their future. Show them the opportunities that become available to people who have great discipline!

Follow these tips, and your child will develop the important quality of Self-Discipline!